That's right. Weasel your way out of life's problems.

Ahhh, it's comforting to know that some things don't change. One day removed from her win from yesterday's column, Amy is back to giving crappy advice:

Dear Amy: My husband has been asked to be a groomsman in an out-of-state wedding of a former colleague. At the time the groom asked him to participate, my husband hastily agreed to the task, then immediately regretted it. There are at least five other groomsmen and other attendants, and there are nine bridesmaids.

My husband is not a very social guy and is not even fond of the groom. Furthermore, we must choose our discretionary expenses carefully, as we have three young children. The cost of this three-day event, including travel, planned activities, baby-sitters, accommodations, formalwear and gifts, is daunting. The wedding is several months away.

Please tell me it's OK for him to extricate himself from this obligation, and let me know exactly how to do it.

Burning bridges is certainly an option.

Thank you in advance for your magical solution.

— Let Him off the Hook

Dear Hook: By the power granted me by the State of Illinois and The Yenta Board, the licensing authority of advice columnists, I absolve your husband of his groomsman duties.

Now all he has to do is tell the groom — today.

He should say to his (soon to be former) friend: "I was so flattered to be asked to be in your wedding. I said yes before I had a chance to think it through. Then I got home and told my wife, and now she won't let me do it — in fact, we're not even going to be able to attend because of the kids. I'm really sorry and wanted to tell you as soon as possible."

You're willing to take the fall for this, right? As the groom is about to learn, taking the fall is sometimes what spouses do for each other.

So let me get this straight: Amy wants this guy to lie and tell his friend (colleague, whatever) that his wife won't let him be a groomsman? Why stop there? Why not just say, "My wife's a crazed loon and she thinks you're a pencil-dicked dipshit who should be kissing the ground your new wife walks on every day for agreeing to marry you"? Seriously? This is the advice Amy offers?

1. First of all, this obviously is selling "Let Him Off the Hook" down the river. The wife apparently doesn't care (she's willing to burn a bridge here to save the expense of the wedding, which is fine), but why do that when there are other options? Word may eventually start to spread about what a selfish bitch LHOtH is. Why go there when you don't have to?



2. Second, by saying "My wife won't let me go," the guy is going to come across as unspeakably lame. Sure, why not heap on some humiliation to go with that selfish bitch stew? But again, why do that if you don't need to?



3. Finally, why lie at all? I mean, aren't we, you know, adults? Why can't you just tell the guy the truth?
   
   "Hey dude, thanks for asking me to be your groomsman. It meant a lot to me. Really. I got a chubby and everything. Thing is, I said 'yes' before really thinking about it. And I realized that the cost of flying everyone out there and getting hotels rooms for all of us was just going to be too much for us this year. You know how tight money is these days. Sub-primes and ethanol fuel, man. Fucking Bush. Right. Vote Obama. Right on. Good luck with your wedding. They change later, but good luck, anyway." *fist tap* *chest bump*
   
   The end.

Seriously, what's so hard about that?