Fail! Fail, fail, fail!!!

Ellie, you are SUCH A FAILURE:

Last year I met a man on a dating website; we developed an intense and satisfying relationship, but I soon suspected that he was hiding something.

After some digging, I discovered that he was married; his wife’s family co-owned his business; he’s having an affair with one of his employees, and dating another woman on the side (talk about busy.)

Even though I ended the relationship, I’m still mortified, not only because of his deceit, but also because we had unprotected sex.

I feel a lot of compassion for his wife. I’d like to tell her what’s going on behind her back, but I don’t know if I should.

- Wavering

You’d do a greater service to go on a talk show circuit – without naming the jerk – to alert hordes of women about the perils of NOT knowing enough about a man before plunging into intimacy. Not to mention the sheer recklessness of having unprotected sex!

As for spilling all to this one woman, his wife, forget it. She may know already that he’s a dog, or she may not. But your story from a stranger won’t necessarily be believed, and, Mr. Deceitful may be convince her you’re the one who’s lying.

Instead of seeking this route to revenge, seek a better way of looking after yourself.

A dating site only provides an introduction. The rest is up to you. After all, it only took “some digging” to find a whole lot of dirt on this guy.

ARE YOU KIDDING ME??? Your advice, completely straight-faced, is to NOT tell the wife that her husband's most likely having unprotected sex wtih multiple women? If "Wavering" had evidence that this man were a convicted murderer, would your advice be the same then, Ellie?

Oh, don't worry about the wife. Worry about your own self, girlfriend. She wouldn't believe you, anyway! Toodles!

*banging forehead on desk*

Have you considered the possibility -- nay, LIKELIHOOD -- that this man is exposing his wife to all sorts of godforsaken diseases? And it's not just the clap or HIV I'm talking about. Certain strains of something as "simple" as genital warts can increase the poor woman's chances of developing cervical cancer. Have you thought about that, Ellie, you rocket scientist?

Note that nowhere am I saying the philanderer should be exposed for being the cad that he is. Like I've said previously, I think that's a much harder decision to make.

But if you KNOW for a fact that this guy is having unprotected sex with other women (i.e. that's YOU, "Wavering"), you owe it to this other woman to let her know what her risks are. Put it like this: If you never said anything and this woman later contracted herpes or chlamydia or whatever, how would you live with yourself?

Damn, who knows where that guy's schmingie has been?